What I learned at the Cannes Film Festival
Three years ago this May I interned at the Cannes Film Festival in the South of France. For those of you who aren’t great at math (@ me), the year was 2018. As my friends and family can attest to, I like to slip my Cannes experiences into conversation whenever possible because it is probably the coolest thing, no definitely, the coolest thing I’ve done.
I went to the red carpet premiere of Han Solo and Blackklansman (yes it was very cool, no I did not get to walk the carpet, I entered through the side with all the other normies). I asked someone to snap a quick picture so it looked like I walked the carpet but it turned out blurry and I look like I’m mid-robot dance. The woman to my left was not a fan of my robot dance.
I got to meet so many amazing people from all over who loved films like me. I even met one of my best friends who was also an intern at the festival. I got to work for an amazing company, roam around the South of France with friends, and bump shoulders with celebrities. By bump shoulders I mean I awkwardly said, “Hi!” at way too high a pitch to Topher Grace and showed Corey Hawkins where the bathroom was in the Marché! So yeah… I’m pretty cool.
I learned a lot about the film industry, and about myself as a by-product of traveling in a foreign country for the first time. Unfortunately, I also got a taste of what it’s like to be sexually harassed in the workplace. Every rose has its thorn and my thorn was the french security guard in his 40s who made kissy faces at me every morning as I tried to get to work. And that was just one guy who bothered me.
I guess it’s more like every rose has its several spiky, annoying thorns.
It was an interesting time to be there. Only two years after the #MeToo Movement initially kicked off. It was still pretty recently that the public acknowledged Emma Loman’s rape allegation against Harvey Weinstein, which took place at the 2006 Cannes Film Festival. Asia Argento, an Italian actress, and Weinstein’s first accuser, raped by him at the 1997 Cannes Festival when she was 21 years-old spoke there (although I wasn’t able to see her speak, unfortunately). It was clear that Cannes had been Harvey’s hunting ground and I tried not to think about it.
The mood was... weird. People wanted to enjoy the festival, not talk about the whole “Weinstein thing” or MeToo. However, it was clear they had to acknowledge it in some way. So the American Pavilion held a panel of female filmmakers, where four women talked about their experiences in the industry. It was still an effort and I was genuinely really excited to hear about their experiences. This was my first time out of the country, at one of the glitziest events in the film industry, getting to hear from women who have my dream job. It all felt like a dream that came with a bad taste every now and then knowing that Weinstein and people like him frequented Cannes. It was like drinking a milkshake, but burping up the gas station sushi you ate the night before. Like all bad tastes, you just try to ignore them and enjoy your milkshake. So I did.
I sat with my friend watching these women speak and both of us felt inspired that one day we could be up there hosting our own panel. They made it through the sexist bullshit of Hollywood and look at them now!
I was beaming with excitement and I felt very motivated to meet more people. It is Cannes after all, you just might meet someone who can give you your big break.
We were told that while you’re in the Pavilion anyone could walk in, implying that “anyone” could be someone really important and if they like you… who knows! After I left Cannes and thought about all the people I met, I realized that while “anyone” could mean someone super cool and high up in the industry, it also means literally anyone. Yes, you need to be accredited to get a ticket, but that’s not to say your credit has to be Schindler’s List. However, I was green, (not to say I’m seasoned by any means now, I’m probably more Aqua I guess? I don’t know) so I thought everyone was very important.
My friend and I were standing beside each other, looking around the Pavilion when an Italian gentleman strolled up with his cool accent, which I foolishly assumed meant he must be some fancy film producer. I have since learned not all Italian men are titans of the film industry.
Anyway, I was flattered he would come up to us. Usually, I was the one approaching people! He started focusing on me and moved in closer, a little too close for comfort. He’s Italian, I thought. They’re just super friendly. He got closer and pulled out his business card and mentioned he was looking for people to work with. In my head I was so ecstatic, I thought for a split second, Oh my gosh! This could be my in. He started complimenting me on my lipstick and how it matched my shirt. I thought, Oh well, he's just being polite.
Just as I thought he was going to hand me his card and walk off, he pointed out that his card also matched my shirt. He held his hand, still holding the card, right against my breast. He said, “See it matches,” smiling at me as if to see if I liked it. He just held it there, smiling. I froze. My friend froze too. Neither of us knew what to do. After what felt like an hour, he laughed and said he hopes to hear from me.
I threw his card in the trash as soon as he left.
I was so shocked and confused by what just happened. Was it even that bad? I mean, maybe he innocently held it up to my chest and it’s not a big deal? Why did I let him do that?
The more I thought about it, the more I started to understand how easily young women could be assaulted or harassed at a place like Cannes. What happened to me is nothing compared to what happened to Emma or Asia. But the fact that I instinctively feel the need to compare our experiences just goes to show that women still have to find ways to justify feeling uncomfortable or unsafe in a work environment.
It’s almost an unspoken thing, but it’s as if women are expected to entertain this behavior in exchange for a career opportunity in the industry. When women are put in a situation where they’re offered an opportunity by a man who's supposed to be the most important person in the room, we’re taught to be polite. To just take the compliment! But what would have happened if I kept his business card? What if I decided it wasn’t a big deal that he touched me without my permission? That it was just an honest mistake? It wasn’t.
It’s three years later and I still can play that moment vividly in my head. I can also remember what it felt like to have the security guards take their time looking through my purse so they could compliment my body and my lipstick. I’ll never forget the story I heard from the only woman who worked at the company I interned for in Cannes about the time she went to the festival and was thrown in the back of a white van while walking back to her hotel. Luckily there were police nearby who saw it happen and got her out. I remember her telling me not to walk alone at night and feeling scared when I had to. I remember hearing that the director of a Nicolas Cage movie (that will not be named) invited interns from the American Pavilion to the film’s afterparty just so he could have young women there. I remember how the male intern I asked to pick up tickets for me almost didn’t deliver them because I wouldn’t come to his room to get them.
All of these things sucked, don’t get me wrong, but I’m grateful I experienced them when I did and that I had so many women around me who made me feel comfortable and safe. These things don’t make up the entirety of my experience. I have way more good memories of Cannes than I do bad. But for an event that’s all glitz and glam, it’s important to talk about what happens behind the scenes of the after parties and red carpets. Sure this was three years ago, but it was ONLY three years ago. Let’s keep working on making sure women feel safe as they enter the entertainment industry and every workplace for that matter.
